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As separated parents you want to make the right choices for your children well mediation enables that discussion to take place safely.
Children are anxious if their parents are going to divorce. The family unit is usually their source of stability and now their future seems unstable and uncertain.
It is very important that parents should try to reassure children that although things may have changed, that their parents are still working together to achieve a sense of continuity for them.
The division of parents into two separate households can be a particular cause for concern.
One way in which you can help children to cope with the changes associated with divorce or separation is to continue with old habits and routines. Children like a sense of certainty and they can gain from proper scheduling and organisation.
Think about things such as children’s bedtime routines, journeys to and from school and maintaining children’s friendships and other social links.
Think also about your home – will you need to split your property how will you manage two houses and expenses?
Children appreciate honesty when talking to them about your ex-partner. However, it is important that you consider your child’s age when you are discussing these issues with them.
You need to be sensitive to the child in all circumstances, thinking about their needs and feelings.
It is important that information is age appropriate. Younger children will not be able to process as much detail as older ones can.
However, you know your children best and should be able to make a judgement as to the form, and content, that you can take in.
Contact us for Family Mediation – 03300 101 354
Mediation can be beneficial for the children involved, as long as both parents are willing to attend. Mediation can actually benefit all parties involved in a dispute because it helps to find a solution to an issue. A mediator can help parents communicate better and can effectively reduce stress in the situation.
Good mediation can also work alongside a therapist to offer parents support during what will likely be a difficult and stressful time. The parent may not even know that they are suffering from conflict and may not feel like talking. This means that a professional can be an invaluable resource to parents who may not be sure about their communication skills or how to approach their children. Sometimes, a parent will be uncomfortable with their own emotions and may feel like talking about the problem is an admission of weakness.
A mediator is trained in how to talk to children and what to do if the child is not responding in the manner that you would like. They can take an issue and help the parents to express their thoughts and feelings without the use of words. They can bring in a neutral point of view to the discussion and help to set goals for the entire family. If a parent wishes to make a complaint, a mediator can provide support.
They can work to reduce arguments, disagreements, conflicts and problems between the parents. The goal of the mediator is to get the parents to communicate more effectively and build a better understanding between them. By helping both parties to communicate more effectively, the mediator can reduce tension that can build up. Sometimes, a parent can become frustrated with the situation and will start to shout and cry at the other party. This can escalate the problem and further exacerbate it, which means that the problem is much larger than the initial issues and that help is needed from a mediator to help the parents to resolve the issues.
For children, a mediator’s goal is to address their child’s needs and feelings as well as their parents and to find a resolution that the child can live with and that works for everyone. Although the parent may feel like they are being ignored, they will learn to recognize when they are being listened to and understand the need for a change.
Mediation can be an effective way to resolve conflicts between parents and children because it helps them work together to find common ground and to work out the issues. Once they reach an agreement, it is more likely that they will keep the relationship strong.
Mediation can be described as an interactive, structured, and confidential process through which parties in a dispute to communicate and negotiate in a spirit of friendship and goodwill. This process is used in conjunction with other tools and procedures designed to promote a peaceful resolution between parties and to reduce the negative impact on the children, friends, or family of either party. Mediation services are usually provided by licensed mediation companies that have extensive training and experience. The services offered by these companies are usually very beneficial for individuals and families who have become frustrated with the level of conflict that often occurs in family law situations.
There are several advantages to using mediation services. One benefit is that mediation may provide a way to reduce the cost of divorce, particularly if the couple is facing economic hardship. Another benefit is that mediation allows parties to settle their disputes with less embarrassment since each side will be represented and both will be able to explain their positions in terms that are easier to understand.
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Family’s are deeply affected by divorce or separation, especially when there are children in the family. Often these painful situations can be helped with the aid of a mediator who will hold a Mediation Intake Assessment Meeting or MIAM. MIAMs can soothe ruffled feelings and ensure that communal assets are divided equally, make sure that financial obligations of both parents are laid out and help to make the break as easy as possible for all the members of the family.
When attending a court proceeding on the matter, the family will need to present an FM1 (Family Mediation 1 form) which confirms that a MIAM has been held.
As of April 2014, significant changes were made to the judicial system regarding separation and divorces, particularly where children were involved. These changes ensure that the welfare of the children is paramount, with minimal impact on the children and as little negativity as possible. One of the major changes was a requirement for a mediation session or MIAM to be attended before any court proceedings to do with financial or custody matters (hence the need for a FM1 to be produced).
If the split is acrimonious and both parties find it difficult to be in the same room, as would happen with face to face mediation, it is possible to ask for shuttle mediation.
Shuttle sessions happen when the two parties are seated in separate rooms and the mediator shuttles between the two, discussing issues and offering solutions.
Shuttle mediation is often a good solution with distance between the parties allowing for rational and reasoned thinking.
Mediation sessions are now a legal requirement, and your ex’s lawyer will make this clear to him or her.
Offering shuttle mediation, in which they will not have to share a room while coming to an agreement, is sometimes a way to make the thought of mediation more palatable.
Mediators can also help with will disputes: resolving issues between heirs and coming to an acceptable compromise in the event that the will is ambiguous or unclearly worded.