Relationships do not always work out as expected. Conflicts and misunderstanding sometimes arise. In some extreme circumstances, break ups become inevitable, however unfortunate. When a couple is breaking up, dividing up property and financial obligations between them is unavoidable. The decisions to be made in this regard are not always easy. Some of the issues that usually arise is how to work out income, assets and liabilities, how to share the assets, liabilities and incomes, how to handle the debts jointly incurred, maintenance for the spouse and child support and so forth.
The necessity of this gives rise to the act of sorting out finances. Different approaches of sorting out the finances may be employed. Mediation is one of them. This is where a neutral and independent party comes on board and aids the couple in this process. Sorting out finances using mediation is a process aimed at reaching a consensus on how the finances of the couple are to be shared between them. Sorting out finances using mediation is often advantageous since the mediator ensures neutrality and hence fairness. More often than not, none of the partners will be disadvantaged.
The first step in this regard is to get a full financial disclosure and set it out in a format referred to as Schedule of Assets and Liabilities.To obtain this, the mediator issues disclosure forms to both partners. This is to ensure that none of the partners hides any financial information which may be unknown to the other. Concealing such information may lead to one partner being unduly disadvantaged. The information is normally filled in those forms in such a manner that it meets the threshold of acceptability before a court of law.
Then, the mediator helps each of the partners to understand and identify their assets, financial obligations, revenues and expenditures. This will include helping them to correctly classify their assets, liabilities, revenues and expenses. The necessity of this in the process of sorting out finances using mediation is that it helps to evaluate available options and the likely effects of undertaking either of them. Each of the partners will then give suggestions on how best to divide the finances. The mediator aids in the negotiations and in reaching the agreement on sharing the finances between. This is aimed at ensuring fairness prevails.
Moreover, the mediator will help the partners identify necessary tasks during and after the process of separation and hence be able to make good choices. Keeping records for the mediation process is also a necessary endeavor and the onus rest with the mediator. The need for the records is that the same will be of great help should one require legal advice to supplement the mediation. Lastly, the mediator will prepare a document outlining all the proposal and agreements arrived at by the partners. This document is called the Memorandum of Understanding. The Memorandum of Understanding is not in itself legally binding but it will be used in making the agreement of the partners legally binding.
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Family’s are deeply affected by divorce or separation, especially when there are children in the family. Often these painful situations can be helped with the aid of a mediator who will hold a Mediation Intake Assessment Meeting or MIAM. MIAMs can soothe ruffled feelings and ensure that communal assets are divided equally, make sure that financial obligations of both parents are laid out and help to make the break as easy as possible for all the members of the family.
When attending a court proceeding on the matter, the family will need to present an FM1 (Family Mediation 1 form) which confirms that a MIAM has been held.
As of April 2014, significant changes were made to the judicial system regarding separation and divorces, particularly where children were involved. These changes ensure that the welfare of the children is paramount, with minimal impact on the children and as little negativity as possible. One of the major changes was a requirement for a mediation session or MIAM to be attended before any court proceedings to do with financial or custody matters (hence the need for a FM1 to be produced).
If the split is acrimonious and both parties find it difficult to be in the same room, as would happen with face to face mediation, it is possible to ask for shuttle mediation.
Shuttle sessions happen when the two parties are seated in separate rooms and the mediator shuttles between the two, discussing issues and offering solutions.
Shuttle mediation is often a good solution with distance between the parties allowing for rational and reasoned thinking.
Mediation sessions are now a legal requirement, and your ex’s lawyer will make this clear to him or her.
Offering shuttle mediation, in which they will not have to share a room while coming to an agreement, is sometimes a way to make the thought of mediation more palatable.
Mediators can also help with will disputes: resolving issues between heirs and coming to an acceptable compromise in the event that the will is ambiguous or unclearly worded.